Polaroid lives on.... Maybe...

I was sad when I realized that my once large stock of polaroid film was running low to the point of total depletion, and with makers discontinuing the film last year its getting harder to replace but then I read this great article in the New York Times about a bunch of Eastern European entrepreneurs wanting to remake the classic film in a factory somewhere in the Netherlands...

Great news, but I wont get overly excited till its avail for purchase once again as I suspect there's a long road ahead of these scientists!

Strawberry Swing

I've been listening to Coldplay a lot recently - they just fit my life so well right now (and I did just catch them in concert at Shoreline which was pure awesomeness). So you can imagine I was super excited to see this new video from them for strawberry swing, and blown away by the sheer beauty of this animation - I don't even know what you call it, but I know it would have taken a LONG time to create and a lot of lying on the floor and for that dedication I salute you Mr.Martin!

Stop Motion

I am really getting into stop motion video these days, not making my own of course - lord knows I don't have time for that!! But I really appreciate the work of others who do dedicate the time. Its a painstaking process but when done right results in beautiful seamless movies.

This is a stunning video from Olympus showing the development of friendships over time...... Love the soundtrack too!

Eclectic 3.0

I cane across this video whilst nosing through the New York Times' blog Lens (a great read by the way) - and the visual quality of this work is just stunning, I love the use of tilt shift and the way it makes everything have that Toy Town look - just stunning.

Eclectic 3.0: The Roads Less Traveled from Ross Ching on Vimeo.

Fallen Disney Princesses

This body of work by Diana Goldstein is just awesome - I love the idea of fallen Disney Princesses. More about the work avail here

I dont like monday

Today was D -Day...Daycare day - the first time in my son's little life that he wont be with me or grandma and will go and be with other kids day in day out. I think he's ready for it, and I know he'll enjoy it - I just wasn't prepared for quite how heartbreaking a thing it would be.

He cried, I cried, he sobbed mama, I broke into little pieces inside. and I left.

I know he's ok there, and I know that as soon as I've gone he will be happy and play and learn so much from the other kids but it still physically hurt to leave him.

Tomorrow is Tuesday, Day 2 of the daycare project. I hope it gets easier.

Oh lord wont you buy me.....

My friends all have Porches and I must make amends........

Fog or Sun?

San Fran has incredibly unpredictable weather, so it can be really hard to plan for your shoots. what to wear? where to photograph? and the pressure of getting it perfect first time round can feel overwhelming.

That's why we say - relax, its only photography and if the weather isn't playing ball the first time around, well just try again. The perfect shot isn't something you can plan for - the best ones are always the spontaneous moments where awareness of the camera is at its lowest.

As for fog or sun? Who knows, we may get both! But either way we can make it work.

Constant Camera

Always carry your camera with you. Never miss another shot.

This cool T-shirt from Egg & Avocado is for Kids but I would love to see an adult version. Or maybe i'll just buy this for my son.

Does anyone have a camera????

You know the moment - its happened to all of us, you see the shot, its perfect, it feels like a Pulitzer prize winning moment and yet you don't have your camera on you, you miss the moment and life moves on.

As a photographer there's nothing more frustrating than missing the shot, knowing it was the one great image for the day - and its gone , never to be reclaimed again. I still have all those moments I missed stored in my head - usually I'm driving and cant stop, or someone else is driving & wont stop and its like slow motion as I cruise past - I can her my imaginary shutter clicking - snap snap snap and the shots unfold before my eyes only to disappear. And a feeling of utter helplessness enfolds you.

I still think about Antigua - As we drove past I saw local children singing on the steps of the school house in matching dresses - I can hear their voices and laughter to this day . I still see my friend throwing her head back in utter joy & laughter on her wedding day - me unable to capture that perfect moment of happiness as I was holding another friend's baby.

These ghost images haunt me and my work - It makes me vow to never be without a camera again, until I forget my vow and then I miss another great shot. And so the process begins again, and another great shot is committed to a dwindling memory....

There's a zombie in my place.

We're teething, and it hurts. Cant sleep in our own beds, and can only drift off when being held for hours at a time, rocking and shushing gently into slumber.

Then the sun comes up and everything is ok again. The night tooth monster has gone away.

4 hours of sleep and the alarm goes off, where am I , what happened? Have to work, feel dead, inside and out. Eyes burning with exhaustion. limbs heavy and uncoordinated.

There's a zombie in my place today.

SAHM v/s WM

I was in a unique position during the first year of my son's life in that I've had the chance to be both a Stay at Home mom (SAHM) and a Working Mother (WM). I don't sit in one camp or another because I am, and was, both, and its equally hard.

Working for yourself you can pick and choose your hours, work as little or as much as you like. I did this in the first few months of new motherhood and being able to take the time to get to know my child was wonderful and i'll never regret having that time off, lunching with my mummy friends, attending classes and playgroups and following the every movement of my baby with fascination. It was hard work staying at home all day, tiring and sometimes completely boring but at the same time 100% rewarding and challenging. I found a new inner domestic goddess - I washed and cleaned, I ironed and took the dry cleaning in. My husband enjoyed living the 1950's fantasty of dinner on the table when he came home from the office and clean pressed shirts. However it wasn't to last, in these harsh economic times every job is precious, and you work twice as hard for half the returns - and so now I leave my son for longer and work harder than I ever did before, and its hard.

The flip side of this extra work is I have never felt more energized and independant, I love what I do and I want to do it well, and I like having the challenge of being busy and getting the jobs done. I feel as though I am back to being me again, albeit a slightly newer model. My brain works on a daily basis and I can leave the house with only 1 bag everyday and in less than 5 mins. I relish the times I am away from my child as it gives me enough freedom that when I am with him I make the most of the time we have. I think having the space to breathe is making me a better photographer and a better businesswoman as I value my time better and am much more efficient. However, I miss my mummy friends and our support for each other thru motherhood, and I feel sad when I hear they are taking their kids to the museum on a Weds and I am out working and I feel that my son is missing out on this time with me and that he's more clingy as a result.

In many ways it might have been easier if I was one or the other, a clearly defined role, but I'm not. And now I've tasted the fruits of both sides and they both are sweet and so no matter where I am I fear the grass may always be greener for me.

Howe Journal Day One

It cold today, really cold. I love and hate this about SF.

I love it as it reminds me where I came from, the cold and wet of London town.

I hate it as its what I moved away from, and yet here it is following me. Where's my palm trees and sunshine and beach? Isn't that California? Yes people say - but this is NORTHERN California. I suppose I should have known better. I am from the north of England - colder and wetter than the south. The word North is synonymous with cold.

And I still haven't learned how to layer. 3 years and counting.